5.06.2009

AFK For Too Long

I have been doing not so well with the regular blogging. So here's an update.

My sleep schedule is messed up. For whatever reason Monday night I could NOT sleep. Was tossing and turning and flitting in and out of sleep until 3 a.m. before I finally said "ENOUGH!" and got up. Went into the kitchen, ate a popsicle (I think?) and sat in my recliner. Next thing I remember is David waking me up at like 7:30 a.m. and being like "Are you ok?" I could NOT wake up, my brain was so foggy, my eyes were open I was "awake" physically, but my brain wasn't functional. So I am sitting there and my phone is on the table next to me. (At this point David had already left) And I was like "why is my phone here? I KNOW I put it on the charger last night" So I call David, "Did I put your phone of my charger last night?" "Nope" he said. "Ok, so..I remember putting A phone on my charger, but my phone is sitting on the table." I said. He says, "I put it next to you so I could call you in a few minutes to make sure you were awake. I told you when I set it next to you." ...YEAH... I didn't remember that at all.


So, I go get Angelina up for school once I remembered how to walk. She went through her normal screaming, crying, I don't feel good, don't want to go to school routine. I really don't remember anymore of that until I got home from taking her to school. I vaguely remember something about a pop-tart. So I get home, it's around 9 a.m., I take my meds and sit down at the computer. Time disappeared from then until about 10:30 when I said I was going to go take a nap because I was falling asleep at my computer.

I went and laid down in bed, tossed and turned, flitted in and out of sleep, was sweating like crazy even with the a/c on and the fan blowing on high pointed right at me. I *think* I may have slept for maybe 30 uninterrupted minutes, woke up with the sheets, my pillowcase, my hair (ew) soaked in sweat. So I got up just after 12 p.m. and the rest of the day was pretty normal after that. (Meaning I remember it)

Then around 7:30 p.m. we went out to play trivia and eat dinner with David's family, I usually write down our answers, so I got the answer sheet and after each question I wrote down and handed in, I couldn't remembe if I wrote the correct answer, or if I even wrote the answer at all. So after 3 questions I'm like "I can't do this!" and handed it off to my sister-in-law. Now, it's not extremely important, but it just bugs me that I keep having these lapses in my memory/ foggy brain so often. I am pretty sure it's from at least one of my meds, but I'm not sure which one. Also, when we got to the restaurant it was loud as usual, but I couldn't stand the noise. I was SO anxious the whole time, then David and his brother started drumming on the table and it just felt like someone was pounding directly on my brain. I almost walked out it was so bad. So anyways the night went on, at one point I totally zoned out, David said that he was calling my name and waving his hand in front of my face and it didn't even register with me, nor do I remember him doing that. I feel better emotionally, but this lack of cognition is really starting to get old. I can't complete my sentences, I get lost midway through and can't remember what I was talking about. <-- this is not something completely new, but in the past (pre-meds) I at least remembered that I was talking, just kind of went off topic. With this new thing, I don't even remember I was talking and will just kind of stop mid-sentence almost like I don't remember the meaning of words that are simple and familiar. It doesn't happen ALL the time, but often enough that I know that something is not right.

So then last night we went to bed about midnight (which is pretty normal) and I fell asleep right away, but I had the strangest jumbled dreams. I don't remember if there was any kind of "theme" or "plot line". I vaguely remember dreaming something about making pot roast, I also was dancing at the Kings and Queens Ball in enchanted (The Disney Movie), I went water-skiing with my dad at the lake in my hometown in Kansas. (And I live in Florida), I think my mom was making me eat oranges and I kept telling her that I'm not supposed to have citrus with my medication. I dreamt that I got my pills mixed up and was staring at my med timer for hours trying to remember what pills went in which box at the correct times. (I have a 28 slot pill box with a timer alarm) Dreamt my Adderall timer was going off at 1 a.m. instead of 1 p.m. and I got up to take it then didn't sleep for 2 days straight because I kept taking it at the wrong time because that's when the alarm went off. I also dreamt that I was playing World Of Warcraft with David (which I had started playing Sunday night in real life) and I was a lvl 80 but was still following him around because I didn't know how to do anything or know where to go to complete the quests. Also we did the instance that we did last night where we just stood there while Stephen ran around with all these prisoners following him with like 80 red health bars filling up the screen, the he cast a spell to kill them all. When you kill something it gets like gold sparkles over it to signify that it has "loot" on it so you can take it. Well...when you have a pile of 88 people that have died in the same area there are a LOT of sparkles. I got mesmerized by it and forgot to loot and just sat there for hours staring at the sparkles on my screen. (In my dream)

I had more dreams than that but I can't remember any of them, but basically I had a LOT of very vivid colored dreams last night. Freud please tell me what it all means!!!

I dunno if I should call my pdoc and tell her what is going on, or just wait till my appointment on May 21? I mean I haven't really done anything to put myself or anyone else in danger. I am still functional and it seems I am doing a lot of things on automatic pilot, still completing things successfully (like driving, etc) without any problems except I can't remember it later. Except I know that I did it because Angelina is not home, and is at school, so I know that I took her there.

Anyway, I think this entry is long enough at the moment. Anyone else experienced this? (I am taking Lamictal 200mg twice a day, Zoloft 150mg at night, Seroquel 100mg at night, Adderall 30 mg in the morning and 30mg at 1 p.m.)

Jessica

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