I haven't given up yet, but I am getting tired of trying to make everyone happy and still feeling miserable. I need to be needed, but not in a needy kind of way. I feel empty most of the time lately except for when I think of certain people, and know that others will never fill me up the way I need them to for any length of time. Because I need someone. I'm running out of ideas. I feel like my brain is drying up. At the same time I am maybe more happy than I've been in a while. I want to do something spontaneous, but everything that sounds appealing has too many unwanted consequences. I so hate consequences. I miss having someone to tell everything to. But I am afraid of getting too involved. Why can't anything be simple?
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